“I’ve learned that waiting is the most difficult bit, and I want to get used to the feeling, knowing that you’re with me, even when you’re not by my side.”
Paulo Coelho, Eleven Minutes

Monday, February 6, 2012

Waiter Haters

Tonight I encountered another one of the many "Waiter Haters". For all of you who don't know who these people are, they are the considerate people who decide to tell every girl waiting for a missionary that they usually don't work out, that it's dumb to wait, that they deserve better, that they will get married before the come home, or --the ever more dreaded -- your missionary will tell you that he doesn't want to be with you anymore. This certain waiter hater decided to say, "I hate to tell you this but every girl who was supposed to wait for my companions never did." That, "they most likely never work out, either they send a Dear John or the missionary writes them off and tells them he doesn't want to be with them anymore." Although I appreciated his "concern" I feel like I know my relationship with my boyfriend better than anyone else who barely knows me. I feel like the answers I have gotten through prayer about my missionary are more relevant than some RM telling me that missionary girlfriends usually don't work out. So therefore I am still diligently waiting and writing my missionary. :)

Today was kind of just a weird day. I don't know how else to describe it. I feel like I was spiritually nourished and that's why there was so much opposition today. Unfortunately I cannot have a good spiritual day without Satan having some say in it. Dumb! But I am just glad I have free agency and power over Satan because I have a body. That's comforting to know too. :)

Tonight I don't want to share just one specific story about Mark and I. I just want to reflect on how he and I strived to keep each other spiritually nourished. Although we had a long distance relationship, he and I read scriptures together over Skype and prayed together too. I loved knowing that I could talk to him about church related topics and not feel awkward. I loved kneeling to pray with him. This was one of the favorite memories I have of him. :) Not that he just loved me, but that he wanted to grow in the gospel with me. I knew I could talk to him about absolutely anything and he wouldn't judge me or think I was a terrible person for asking something. I knew he was always there for me no matter what. :) I feel like we are still there for each other now! We aren't nearly as close as we used to be (distance wise), but I know that he is still here in my heart. I can still feel him around me and I know this sounds weird, but I sometimes have conversations with him in my head. I wonder what his opinion would be and I know what he would tell me sometimes. :) I love that I know him that well. :) It makes me feel better. :) I miss my missionary a lot, but I am doing what I can here to prepare for life after he comes back. I feel like as long as I grow in the gospel along side of him that when he comes back he and I will be able to feel like those two years were a wonderful experience for both of us. :) I want to be just as spiritually strong as he will be. :) I know I can do it! :)

"I might not be there yet, but I am closer than I was yesterday." :)


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