2 Years of Marriage?!

I cannot believe I haven't written in so long! Let me catch you up to speed!

Mark and I have been married for over 2 years now! It has just flown by. Once your missionary comes home it's like time just flies.

We both went to school and graduated. He graduated with his associates of science and I got my bachelor's degree. We both worked for a year while we waited to hear back from my PA schools. (PA school is hard to get in to and expensive!) I ended up looking into some accelerated bachelor's of nursing programs as well. I got accepted into a program at Roseman University in South Jordan and will get my bachelors degree in nursing in June. I've enjoyed learning about nursing and am excited for the future career.

Mark is going to UVU for computer engineering and I am so excited for him!

Other than us both going to school and working we are just hanging out and constantly learning more about each other and our relationship. I thought I knew everything about him when we first got married, but I knew nothing compared to what I know now.

Our first year of marriage was hard. We were both getting used to how we each do things around the house. We also moved a lot. We first moved into a studio apartment. Mark didn't realize how much junk I carry around with me (haha poor guy) so we moved into a one bedroom apartment after that. Mark worked a night job and I had a hard time with that. (As well as finding scorpions and snakes in the apartment. Let's just say I called him crying while he was out of town. Haha.) So he ended up taking a job to help his mom out at a motel and we moved into the back of the motel with his mom. I love my mother in law and I am SO lucky she loves me so much haha. She's seriously the sweetest human being. After I graduated college and got a new full time job at the VA in Ivins we were able to move out and into a two bedroom apartment, which was my favorite apartment. I miss it so much. I LOVED being a CNA and got the honor of serving our veterans.

I think it was around this time when we celebrated our first anniversary! It was fun to take this picture. There was actually a couple who had just gotten married in the background (I cropped them out haha). We went to Fiesta Fun and raced some go-carts and did some bowling. That's like our competitive game haha. (Have you heard Jim Gaffigan's skit on bowling. GO LOOK IT UP!)

SO now fast forward to nowish. We moved to northern Utah for me to go to school and Mark is now going to school, too. We celebrated our second anniversary! 

I think looking back on these pictures will be fun to see where we were living at the time. Oh and it was raining that day! It was bright outside with rain coming down and the wind blowing my bangs everywhere... It was hard to get a nice picture haha.

Before marriage I was learning a lot about life and science. In marriage I have learned a lot about myself. It's been the biggest learning experience of my life. A roller coaster of ups and downs. The ups definitely make the downs worth it. I love Mark even more than I did before we got married. He's a great person and I'm lucky to have him in my life. :)

What I Want You to Know

Alright people, it's time to talk!

I wanted to address something that I feel is super important, especially for you who are still waiting for your men to come home. :)

IT'S OKAY TO TALK TO, GET TO KNOW, OR EVEN GO ON A DATE WITH ANOTHER GUY!

I don't mean to bash on any girls who have decided to not date and wait heck I had also decided that. What I want to do is let you all know why it's not a terrible idea and if you want to do that then it's okay!

We all, especially those of us who are very active on the waiting groups, feel this sense of dedication to our missionaries. Not only that, I also felt that I needed to prove the world wrong. I have to prove that at 17, I know what I want and who I want to marry for time and all eternity. I HAVE TO PROVE EVERYONE WRONG!

I want to tell a little story of why I feel this way about my experience waiting for missionaries. If you've read my posts you already know this, but bear with me as I explain why I say what I am saying.

The first guy I sent out on a mission I dated for 2 years and a month. In a time in high school where dating someone for three months is an eternity I felt like I was pretty much married to the guy. We celebrated monthiversaries together. He'd surprise me with Skittles and stuffed animals. I brought him into the church. We went to school dances together. We would prank each other. He was the first guy I kissed, first guy I fell in love with. We would drive in the middle of nowhere with a blanket and lay in the back of his truck to look at stars. My best friend was also one of his friends. I thought I'd always love him, our love was indestructible and for forever.

Before he left on his mission I told him "I think I'll wait for you". He appreciated that, but told me he wanted me to date other people. We agreed that the day he went into the MTC was the day we were officially broken up. That day was so rough, one of the hardest of my life. While he was gone I would cry daily and nightly. I couldn't believe he was gone. The guy who was my best friend wasn't there to talk to every second of the day and I couldn't handle it. It was the worst time I've ever been through.

A couple months after he was gone I went on a trip back east with my stake to see church history sites. I met a few more people from my stake and I actually met a couple guys from a different stake. When I came home I kept talking to these guys and next thing I know their cousin started texting me. I kept talking to him because he actually talked back to me haha. It was fun to get to talk to people again and just get to know them.

Shortly after the cousin and I began dating. We met each other in person and decided we wanted to exclusively be in a relationship. I didn't know how to tell my missionary about all of this so I waited a few weeks and kind of hinted at it in a letter. Next thing I know he's telling me in his email that his sister said I have a new boyfriend. After the next email I sent him confirming it he acted as if he could care less about it. I understood that he was probably just brushing it off and not letting it bother him because let's be honest it was probably the least of his worries at the time. A while later I just had to ask him about it all. He let me know that he thought our relationship was "the same everyday". It was almost like he didn't care and thought I was boring... I spent 2 years on this guy! And he thinks I'm boring? What was I doing in a relationship with someone and guarding my heart from other people for someone who thought our relationship was boring.

After that time I decided I needed to really move on. I finally started to give up on that idea that my missionary and I would get back together and come to terms with that break up. Of course my new boyfriend helped me get through this process so much. I was totally open with him about the whole thing and he was completely supportive. This showed me how amazing a guy he was. How special he really was. This new guy ended up going on a mission and I waited for him. We are now sealed in the temple for time and all eternity! YUP! That guy that I met when I thought I was going to marry a different missionary was my Mark.

While Mark was on his mission though, I didn't stay a recluse. I realized I still had A LOT of growing up to do. I needed to socialize and I did hang out with a bunch of guys. I realized you can get to know them WITHOUT dating them. They all knew my situation and all respected that. I met some of my best friends during these years, many who are GUYS! Gasp. I didn't want to miss out in anything and those years are some of the favorite of my life. :)

I feel many of us who wait for our missionaries lose sight of WHY we are waiting. We aren't waiting to prove anyone wrong. We aren't waiting because we have to. We are waiting because we WANT to. Because you feel that man is special enough to wait for. Because you feel you could marry that guy. Because for YOU, HE is the best decision for you.

Remember you don't have to marry the guy you are waiting for. I know many girls whose guy comes home and it just simply doesn't work out. That's okay! As long as you're doing things to continue on in your progress while he is gone it's okay that you don't end up marrying him. It's okay if you date someone else and you don't end up waiting for this guy the whole time. I also know many girls who while they were waiting found another guy who was better for her than the guy she was waiting for. He wasn't a bad guy, he just wasn't for her. I'm not saying string someone along. I'm not saying go out and date every guy in the ward. What I'm saying is follow your promptings, it might just be the Holy Ghost telling you to do something. After being married myself I am so glad I followed the prompting and answers I got. My past failed relationships don't matter anymore. They are experiences I had and I am glad that I didn't let those get me down in finding someone who really wanted an eternal relationship.

What I honestly want you guys to know is marry someone you love. Someone you will never give up on and who will NEVER give up on you. Marry someone who makes you happy. If you think you don't need to date while he's gone then don't! If you think you should talk to some guys and get to know them then do! If you think you should date someone else then do it! If your missionary doesn't end up marrying you because you dated other people or for any other reason then that's okay, your husband will! :)

Wedding Week is Finally Here

WE GET MARRIED ON FRIDAY!

Holy moly I can't believe that this week is finally here. It's like a dream! Bridal showers, bachelor party, school finals and moving out. Can't say this month has been easy but good golly it's gonna be worth it! (Just like the entire two years... :) )

I have to say that now that I am with him all the time it's weird to not be around him or at least talk to him for a long period of time. I am wondering anymore how I was able to let him go for so long, but I am so glad I did and SO glad that's the last time I have to do that for that long!

Wedding plans, oh my gosh! It's fun yet stressful! If anyone out there reading this is planning a wedding you know what I mean! There's so many more details that I didn't think about. We all think about the cake, dress, centerpieces, decorations. Then you have to also count in ring sizing, dress dry cleaning, printing out pictures... it's crazy! Don't forget about those things! They can be hecka expensive!

Our relationship has gotten SO much better! I am much more used to having him around, which makes life easier for the both of us. ;) We have learned to communicate better and how to not make each other mad every other day. It's nice to get along so well and finally feel adjusted to being with each other. It took us a few months, but we finally got the hang of this!

The only thing I really want to emphasize on for those reading this is so much emphasis is given to receptions for the wedding, the details, the dress, the pictures, but one thing that should be emphasized most is why you are getting married. You aren't getting married just for other people or to have a big party. One thing I've learned is you don't get married for yourself. Meaning you get married because you like seeing the other person happy and you want to make that person happy for the rest of eternity. You want to share your life with them. You get married to be sealed to them for eternity, make and keep covenants with our Heavenly Father, and be able to start a family. I had heard before that "I don't need a piece of paper to tell me I'm married or make me committed." I thought about this for such a long time and agreed, it's a commitment you make inside before you put it on paper, therefore why do we need to get married and have it be legal and documented? In a talk from Elder Holland 'Of Souls, Sacraments, and Symbols' he talks about how legally putting down that you are married on paper and in writing makes it THAT much more of a commitment. That you are declaring and making the sealing more final than ever. Leaving evidence and giving yourself wholly to that one person. In this talk he then talks about sex after marriage. I know, if you're still waiting for your missionary this isn't something you really think about, some girls quiver at the word. But this talk will change your perspective of this aspect of marriage. It changed mine and I will never look at it the same. PLEASE listen to this talk if you haven't already. It's worth the whole what? 45 minutes.

Marriage is about making someone else happy, the covenants you make with Heavenly Father and the starting of a family.

... with that said, here goes nothing! :D ;)

Busy Busy Busy

Life has gotten so crazy lately! I mean it! Having Mark home has been a dream come true. Although it's not like a perfect fairy tale in the end it's all been good. Seriously guys waiting for 2 years to see someone and then jumping back into a full blown relationship after not being in a serious one (meaning I couldn't see him for two years) was so hard! I will definitely say it's a lot of tears and heartache because you just want everything to be perfect but you have to really communicate to someone about your own flaws instead of keeping them in. Let me tell you, that was hard! I think it was also difficult for him to realize I'm not exactly like I was when he left, but he has adjusted to the new me and still loves me. :) If you're waiting for someone and reading this I have some advice. Don't expect everything to be perfect. I know, I hated all of these blogs and posts about how terrible life is when the guy you've been waiting so long to comes home and it's definitely not terrible. It's just a change. Change can be good or bad depending on how you take it. As long as you're expecting to just be back into a relationship where there are good times and also bad then you know what to expect. :) I'm not saying everything can't be perfect, I know one couple who has probably never fought their entire relationship! I can't imagine being like that but that's just who they are. That's awesome. :) I am too egotistical haha.... so we have little tifts but nothing that can't be worked out. :)

One thing waiting has done is helped me be patient and goodness am I so grateful for that now! We are getting married in 2 months and 4 days, exactly. Mark has gotten 2 jobs to save up for that and so we can make it by. I am going to school and also have a part time job so lets just say that we are both really busy and rarely get to spend time with each other. I have learned to appreciate those time I have with him, even though he's in the same TOWN as me. It's crazy to think of how far we have come together. I love him a lot and I just want to know how fortunate I am for the rest of my life. :)

Temple Time

I hope some of you out there are reading this... and waiting for me to finally tell you that we are engaged! :) 

The story of how we got engaged? Well we were official on Facebook before we ever had a ring. Heck we are in love and are getting married, who needs a ring?! But he finally did the whole proposal thing again. :) It was so sweet. :) 

He wanted to take me on a temple date that whole week, but he had gotten sick on Monday, the original date of THE date, so we finally went on Friday? I don't remember, is that terrible? Haha it was Friday January 17th. :) Anyways he took me to a nice dinner and then we were going to go to the temple. We just started walking around the temple like we normally do and he walked me to the bench in the far corner of the temple grounds. :) He was talking about everything imaginable! :) He talked a lot about our future together though and at one point started talking about how he hoped I would put up with his imperfections and asked me if I would. I thought he was going to get on one knee right there after I said yes, but he didn't! He just gave me his jacket and we kept on talking about life, families and how we both just fit in to each other's and the future. 

We got up and started walking again. He walked me all the way around then to the front and asked where the Wedding Exit was. I showed him and he was like Oh okay. We stood right there at the exit and he hugged me and gave me a kiss. He grabbed my left hand and pulled me around and tried to spin me into him where we could dance, but his shirt button got caught in my hair... So that ruined that moment haha. :) He and I just laughed and continued to hug. He heard some people coming and so we walked to some benches by a tree. I thought we were going to walk out of the grounds because that's where we were headed but he stopped me and started giving me a hug again. :) He kept on talking about the future and me and him. He then asked me, "Are you ready to make this thing official?" He got down on one knee and pulled the ring out and asked me to be his wife. :) Of course I said yes and then we were engaged. :) All over again. ;) 

Since that was over a month ago I think I should fill everyone in. Wedding planning is going great! It's so crazy how easy and calm I feel about it all. Probably just because I just want to get married, I don't really care about the whole SHABANG of it all. We ARE making it formal and traditional though. :) I am super excited to get married to Mark FINALLY! Life now that he has been home for a little over 2 months has been good. We have had a lot of ups and downs, but mainly ups! :) We are still getting used to actually being around each other, but we have almost finally gotten used to it. :) It was a hard adjustment, him coming home and both of us realizing how each of us have changed, but we have worked out a lot of things since he has been home. :) Life is good. :) I am just so excited to start the next part of my life. :) We have been together for a little over 3 and a half years and I am just so excited to be married to my best friend. :) May 9th, 2014 couldn't come fast enough!

 

He's Home!

He is home! :D 

He has been home for a day over a week now and I just wanted to blog about how everything has been going. :) 

The night he came home! I don't know if any of you have stayed up on our story, but I wasn't supposed to find out when he was really coming home. But someone who somehow became in the know about the date told me when he was coming. Therefore I knew when he would be home. :) When that day came OH MY GOSH I was freaking out. I got ready about noonish and just sat and waited. Every knock at my door I freaked out a little inside. It finally became 9:00 and I had had enough of waiting for him to come, I kind of got a little cranky! (I feel bad now. haha) My roommate got us playing a card game and I was all ready to win when the next thing I knew there was a knock at the door and my boyfriend came walking in to my apartment. My roommate got a full video of this, but unfortunately because she has the camera card I don't have it right now.... But here is a Facebook link that HOPEFULLY will send ya there and let ya watch the video. :) https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10201070345060911&l=210738060703303171

If you have watched that you can see the look on my face... absolutely priceless as my roommate says. :) I could NOT believe my boyfriend was there! After all of that I went to sit next to him on the couch and he just pulled me in and we cuddled for a bit. We tried to watch a movie that night, but everyone left the room so we got to talk and just be there with each other and no we didn't kiss. He told me from 2 months ago that I should be patient with him, so I didn't want to pressure him in to doing something he wasn't comfortable with. We got to talk a lot that night and then the next day too. :) That's when we finally kissed. 

I'd love to say that everything has been perfect, but it hasn't been. We were together a year and a half before he left, which was enough time to get out of the "puppy dog" stage and into a real life relationship. It's been difficult since he's come home-- just because we are both not used to having each other around. I for one am used to being alone a lot and he is used to having a male companion with him 24/7. That took some time to get used to and just working everything out. It hasn't been all smiles, but it definitely hasn't been all tears either. A relationship is tough, but is also totally worth it! 

He has been home a week and the 2nd day he was home he was asking how soon we could get married. :) I feel like he's been home forever! The past couple days have been some of the best and I couldn't ask for anything better. :) I love him so much and I am so excited to have him home. :) Now we can finally start our future instead of just talk about it. :) 

Waiting for him was only a blink of our eternity. :) 

2 years later... 

MAYBE the Last Couple Weeks!

I cannot believe how long it has been since I have written on here! It has been almost 6 months! Holy cow!

Life has been just busy. :) I started my new semester at Dixie State University (it's a University now..woot! ;)) ANYWAYS School is just school, nothing too awesome going on there. I actually don't like school that much haha. I used to enjoy it, but now that I'm almost done with my Bachelor's I'm like ughhhhhh. Maybe I'll like it after my Bachelor's? Who knows. BUT That's not the reason anyone would be reading this blog, my rantings about school. You might want to know more about how Mark is. :) Well I definitely can talk about that! :)

Communication has been reduced to emails every week. It's not much, but it keeps me sane. :) I got a package for my birthday, which was awesome and I think I wrote about -- other than that there hasn't been any snail mail. ;) I feel like his mission has been going well. With what I can get out of him he likes his companion. :) So that's gotta be good right? haha.

As for the day he is coming back he still won't tell me for sure. I have done some investigating... well kinda not really STUMBLED upon, purely. ;) I know a couple girls who had missionaries go to the same area and they are coming home on the 19th of December, but they've stayed in that same area as for Mark he did move to another area so I was thinking it's a possibility that he could come home a week earlier or so, but I decided to take that idea out of my head, so I am set on the 19th of December. HE tells me that January 2nd is the day he's coming and his mom said that was the date on his plane ticket, but I just never know haha. From this I don't know if I have only a couple weeks left to 3 weeks or a little more than a month... Haha. So we will hope for sooner than later, but when he comes home and how he sees me again for the first time is a mystery to me as much as it is for you. :)

I have learned so much from my experience for the last little bit of waiting. People say that it goes by super fast and honestly I can't really think about when he had 2 months left or anything I feel like it went from 4 to a few weeks left! I definitely am still trying to keep myself preoccupied, but everyone around me is getting excited too. :) His cousin is freaking out haha. :) I try to not think about it, but because of that it's super hard to stay preoccupied. :) I feel like a couple weeks should go by super fast, but it has been dragging! We have Thanksgiving break this week so I think it'll go quick after that. :) I am excited to sleep haha!

Mark and I have been kinda having a tough time. It's hard to realize that everything you know now and have been used to for 2 years is about to change drastically. It's weird for me to think about having a boyfriend in town with me. It might sound weird, but I feel weird being single in a singles ward and not able to date. The fact that I'm waiting for a missionary got around like wild fire and I haven't really ever gotten asked out on a date. I am excited to be able to start dating Mark and having that person around that I can confide in. :) Two of my best friends that I would hang out with a lot, Mark's cousin being one of them, started dating each other. Therefore that situation has gotten kind of awkward for me and of course they don't realize the epic third wheeling they are able to do. Since it's Mark's cousin and I have gotten super close to both of them I don't want to just write them off, but it'll be nice to have Mark home so my life isn't awkward with couples haha. I think about how nervous I am for Mark to come home and I can't even imagine how HE is feeling! His whole world is changing and I can tell he isn't himself right now. I hope that by the time he comes home he will feel better about it all, but we won't really know until he does come home.

I think the number one thing I want to tell anyone reading this is to not let anyone around you tell you about your relationship. This might be confusing and you might be like, "Well duh Jennica." But I guess I am someone who just likes reassurance from the people around me. My mom has always been super supportive of the whole situation. She is just like, "Make sure that you really love him and care about him still when he come home." I told her that every time I think about him coming home I get nervous and that I know I am just going to start bawling when I see him again. That's all she needed for reassurance and we continued to talk about our wedding plans haha. My mom has been super awesome this whole time. :) As for Mark's cousin here at school he has been supportive to a point. He kept on telling me today IF Mark and I work out, but he hopes we do. My dad even was saying he isn't planning on getting a plane ticket here for a wedding until we "know we want to get married." I'm like thinking you guys just don't get it! I got super sad and let it affect me because Mark and I didn't have too awesome of an email today. He wasn't in a great mood and I kind of wrongly took offense to something he had said, but I totally ignored everything he had said. He reassured me that we were in this together and that he loves me. What more did I need? I wrote him a letter and it made me feel a lot better. My emotions have kind of been going crazy from excited to scared to really nervous. I FEEL LIKE I AM BIPOLAR! I hope the next couple weeks just goes by fast because I don't know how much longer I can feel like a mental person haha.

In the end I just miss Mark... a lot. He has been my best friend for over 3 years and we both know what we want from this relationship. I have gotten 2 specific confirmations about Mark and me getting married in the end and THAT was from the big man upstairs. :) We all know He is never wrong. :) I don't want to doubt my relationship anymore and him coming home will be such a relief. :) I love him and I am so nervous, excited, and scared to see him again! :)

Horse Riding!

Catching Fire was SOOOOO Good!

Shooting some archery!

We walk the dogs from the pound every week. This one was so cute!

Halloween Costumes. Gryffindor wins!